It’s Quadrille time at d’Verse
I got so caught up in the shadows I forgot to watch the word count – duh.
Here’s my revision
~
I walked around the lake
the way we used to
and looked for you when I
heard the hawks
over head
As the sun cast long fingers
of orange across the water
I longed to see your shadow
fall across my path once more
I love this one! I have no idea how you can be so elegant with words so often! I can rarely pen what I feel.
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Thanks so much 🙂 I’m blushing. It’s in there, just let it go in whatever direction it wants.
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I think the second version made the longing even stronger… the shadow cross the path is so strong.
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Thank you kindly 🙂
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I’m with Bjorn. Even better. (And whoopsie on the words. I usually count. Must have just trusted you.) 😉
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😉
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Shorter is better in this case, but I liked them both.
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Thanks. I’m glad I went back and made the revision.
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Amazing how this prompt has elicited so many responses tinged with loss. Poignant.
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A poignant shadow indeed!
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Love FliGht
oF Hawk
shadows
Love liGht..
reMinder BriGht…:)
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beautiful response 🙂
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As always..
Thanks for
Your inspiring..
Poetry..:)
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I love both versions. 🙂
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thanks Mish 😊
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Both are lovely. I think I prefer the longer version.
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Thanks. I think I did too.
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